This is a real article. Not by the Onion.
Somebody actually said these things and wrote these words.
NO IT ISN’T! The Borowitz report is satire! Please correct your source.
john looking through the cabin pressure art book!!
My comic is in this book! I’m a happy fish!
How would you like your Hobbit?
BUT WHAT IF IT’S SEBASTIAN MORAN BEHIND IT
Astronaut readjusts to life back on Earth
> Don’t give him a baby for a while.
HE GRABS THE CUP BUT THEN HE DROPS THE PEN 0.0003 SECONDS LATER
AND HE LOOKS UP AT THE CEILING INSTEAD OF AT THE GROUND WHEN HE CAN’T FIND THEM
I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING HE JUST DROPS IT
IT’S NOT FUNNY IT’S VERY LOGICAL THAT HE WOULD HAVE ADJUSTED TO LIVING LIFE WHILE HE WAS IN SPACE BECAUSE IT’S DIFFERENT FROM EARTH BUT I CAN’T FUCKING BREATHE
YES IT’S BACK ON MY DASH THIS IS MY FAVORITE VIDEO
the look of abject confusion on his face when he turns back and the cup and pen aren’t hanging in the air where he left them…!
where he left them
THIS IS KIND OF ADORABLE?